| Monday, May 11, 2009 |
| In a state of quandary |
After 5 weeks of struggle for clinicals at the hospital, i was officially forced to give up due to my incompetence. Ask me if my supervisors' assessment were fair to me? I have no idea. I do know that I may not have the most brilliant ideas, and that I may have difficulty communicating or articulating my ideas across at times. What I do not know is the meaning of failing until now. Thinking about my whole academic life, I have never failed anything or having to retake anything. Why now? I cant believe I cant get through. I took on the constructive feedbacks humbly and positively. I tried my best. I feared and worried but I prayed and hoped. Yet, to no avail. Now, Im lost in a state of quandary. And I have a hundred random thoughts that run through my brain: thoughts of giving up altogether, thoughts of running away, thoughts of how much things will change, thoughts of the heartache and worries my parents will have, thoughts of how I wont get a job as a clinical dietitian. You name it, I have it as a fragment of my thoughts.
My smile is lost beneath the blankness, my faith dug deep in the ground.
Carry me Father under your wings & bring me out of my despair.
Take my tears and turn them to living water of strength & power.
Bring me to your promises again.
Happy birthday to me. |
posted by kai @ 11:59 PM  |
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| About Me |
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Name: kai
Home: Brisbane, Australia
About Me: A lady in-transition, penning down her insignificant thoughts of life and indulging excessively in a world of her own.
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